10 Ways NOT to Get Published.

There is a ton of great information out there about getting published. After attending some conferences and studying the craft, I’ve learned a few ways that are certain NOT to get you published. Here is my top ten:
#10. Write a story about a witch and wizard school.
#9. After several drinks at a conference mixer, find all the agents and editors and give them your story pitch like you’re speed dating.
#8. Don’t thank the publisher for their very insightful and helpful rejection letter, but respond that you will find someone else who appreciates your work.
#7. Immediately follow-up with the manuscript shuffle by sending another story, even if they haven’t asked for it.
#6. Don’t listen to the input of critique groups because it’s subjective and maybe they just don’t get it.
#5. Have no presence in social media because “your writing will sell itself”.
#4. Don’t follow the submissions guidelines on a publisher’s website – just send a form letter, they won’t notice.
#3. Send a query to an agent who says they are closed to new clients. They may just be open for you.
#2. Tell the potential publisher that you have just written the next Harry Potter (refer back to number ten).
#1. Don’t spend time writing and don’t submit your work.
What else do writers need to avoid? Please feel free to add some helpful advice.

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